When the Smoke Clears
by fictionlover6060
Summary: I was running, but I was not expecting to run into a tall stocky native. He took one look at my face and said the one thing I wasn't expecting. "You too, huh?"  He asked.  "Yeah."  And with that one word, we became allies united in our hatred of Sam Uley.
1. Perfectly Mismatched

"Damn it." The words flew out of my mouth before I could filter them, not that I would have, they were warranted. I just took a long overdue trip down what I like to call 'I can't believe my life has fucking come to this' lane. Yes, there is such a place. It's a sad fucked up little place, but it exists. Let me tell you, it was not a happy ride, it was more like a wrong turn and a 'how the hell did I even get here!' kind of place. The doughnut maker was nice though…sure beats the muffin man on his perfect little Drury Lane…fuck him. Back to my point though, it wasn't a pretty little eye-opener. I believe the word I'm looking for begins with a 'p' though, hmmm… pressure… pompous…purgatory…oh wait, I know…pathetic! But was it true? Yes. Why? Keep reading.

My fun little road trip ended up with me outside of Quil's house, yes Quil's house, don't you dare fucking laugh at me, with my plate of gigantic homemade double chocolate chip cookies in hand. So yes, my life has come to me hanging out with a sixteen year old, and not just any sixteen year old, the one and only Quil Aterea. So yeah, you could say my life is all kinds of fucked up right now. Le fucking sigh. I hesitated by my truck while thinking about my sad little life. Man the hell up, Swan. And with that I put my poker face back on and marched up to the door with all the confidence I could manage to find.

He was there before I even got to the top step of the porch, holding the door open with a goofy grin on his face…and I thought _I_ was bad. He grabbed me into a hug and pulled me into the house so fast the world tilted. He is just lucky I was paying more attention to the cookies in my hand than thinking of ways I would punish him for that little stunt. It would be epic, oh the things you can do with cast iron skillets….

After Quil's touchy-feely moment I quickly placed the cookies down before I dropped them, or more likely, Quil did something to cause me to drop them, which would piss me off. Though, I think he enjoys testing my limits, or at least toeing my lines. That or he likes to see the impossible color my face turns when I'm yelling. Bastard.

Speak of the devil, I turned to look for Quil and there he was, already lounging lazily on the couch with a smug grin on his face. Or, at least, he had one until he remembered it was my turn to pick the movie. He was looking slightly scared, though he was trying hard to hide it. *Evil Laughter* It was tempting to punish him, but he was already scarred enough. The look on his face was fucking hilarious though. Okay, so I might have made him watch a chick flick marathon with me last month…so what? He deserved it for being an idiot. It's not like he didn't cry during _The Notebook _either. Anyways, I contemplated for a minute before I took pity on him and picked out the second Lord of the Rings movie. I settled in for a bit and waited patiently for my favorite part. I don't think there was any drool this time. What? I have a thing for elves. Hmmm…Haldir….

We watched the movie in companionable silence, occasionally shifting to get more comfortable. How I managed to end up curled into him, I still haven't figured out. We don't have any romantic feelings towards one another. In fact, we have not even been friends long. Our friendship was formed more out of convenience and sheer loneliness than out of any real desire to get to know each other beforehand. We had both lost the last friend we had to that asshole stalker Sam Uley. I swear the man hid in the bushes. No, our friendship was made from mutual anger and survival. We did what we did to survive and nothing anyone says is going to change that. It works for us.

Not that I don't enjoy hanging out with Quil, quite the opposite actually. His twisted sense of humor is just what I need to get a laugh out of me. And Quil? Well, I think he just needs the quiet and calm reassurance that I give. He knows that I would not, physically cannot, leave him. The poor guy has watched guy after guy fall for Sam Uley's bullshit, get roped into whatever story he twisted. He watched as his two best friends drifted off and closed up. He took it silently when they told him they couldn't be his friends anymore. So I think it makes sense that all he wants is a sense of security.

The day I ran into him was the day my life re-ended. Jacob Black had sucked every drop of life I had left into the cold depths of his oblivious anger. I call it oblivious because I doubt he saw my expression, he didn't hear my heart break. I loved him, not the way he wanted, but I loved him. I had walked away with all the dignity I could muster until I was out of sight. That's when I had run, I went as far and fast as I could. I hadn't thought before taking off and I certainly wasn't expecting to run into a tall stocky native on my path to nowhere. He caught me as I staggered back. He took one look at my tear-streaked face and angry eyes and said the only thing I wasn't expecting at that point.

"You too, huh?" He had such an empty expression that I didn't think, didn't care. I just hugged him, I threw myself at him and held him for dear life. He didn't seem to care about my tear streaked face and muddy clothes either. He slowly wrapped his arms around me and I saw the same sadness in his eyes that I knew was in mine. Those swirling black depths reflected every emotion, every hurt, every fear held in mine. He _knew. _He knew how I felt, how lost I was. I spoke before I knew my lips had parted and that whispered word was the beginning of something beautiful.

"Yah." With that one word, we became allies united in our hatred of Sam Uley. He held me close and swept me into his arms. Then he started walking. I didn't protest, if I remember correctly. I just let him take me. At that point, I just didn't have any fight left. Even now I haven't figured out how we ended up at his house watching a movie like we had always been doing it, like we weren't broken.

That was how our friendship began. With one common everyday word and a hug. Of course, we had been acquaintances before, but we hadn't spoken to each other, not really. I had watched that look in his eyes from a distance. He had been ignored too, he was dying inside along with me. Quil would acknowledge me and I would nod back. But, it was the day that Jacob black ruined any chance he ever had at redeeming himself that our paths crossed. That was the day we became friends. It was the first time we spoke, I mean, actually spoke. It was the day after his life had been shattered in the same ways as mine. It was the day fate threw as at each other.

I think I know why. We have learned a lot from each other. I learned that having a mouth like a sailor was an accomplishment worth noting, videogames are essential to life, and that violence is always a solution. He taught me to pick myself up when I fall, and that there is nothing wrong with being a little battered before it's all said and done. He's helping me with my lousy coordination and I'm teaching him how to cook necessities like eggs and bacon. I'm teaching him how not to be me. We're good like that. I thought our little friendship was perfect within itself, but boy was I wrong.

It wasn't until Leah crashed into our lives that we knew what we were missing. She stormed into his house all windblown and wild one day and declared, and I quote,

"I can't believe you motherfuckers would leave me out of the 'I fucking hate that butt-muncher Sam Uley's fucking guts' little powwow we're having here. How dare you?" Her grey eyes sparked in delight and I knew she was playing. Not kidding, but playing.

"It's join of your own accord. We never said it was exclusive." Quil just smirked at her. I laughed at his face as she plopped down onto my lap and grabbed a cookie. From that point on we were inseparable.

Leah was the missing piece to our small puzzle and I don't know where we'd be without her. She taught me that being timid and weak isn't going to get me anywhere. She showed me how to exude confidence and boredom and how to put words in my eyes. She told me that there's nothing wrong with a broken heart, but there is something wrong with the way I was dealing with it. She told me that she loved Sam Uley until she broke her heart into tiny pieces. I told her I knew how she felt. She taught me how to pick myself back up and how to look at my relationship from an outsider's point of view. Without her I never would have realized that Edward Cullen was a controlling, possessive and manipulative asshole.

Leah taught me how to be strong when I didn't feel it and how to be brave when all I wanted to do was run. With Leah's help I was a new person. She told me that hiding behind my hair made me look pathetic and that if I got any thinner I would be anorexic. She nursed me back to health and beat me into shape until I was every bit as pretty as I wanted to be. She taught me how to look at myself without degrading myself and how to talk without agreeing to anything I didn't want to do. I swear that she's the woman that came up with the phrase, 'if you got it, flaunt it'. She did everything for me before making me do it myself. She taught me to be my own fucking person and I loved it.

The more time I spent with Leah, the more I realized she was drowning. She was trapped with no escape. She had to watch as the man she still somehow managed to somewhat love prance around like nothing ever happened, like he hadn't ripped out her heart and spat on it. She was getting over it, slowly, painfully. She had planned out their lives, their futures, and he had thrown it away. She covered the hurt with anger, white-hot rage. And then, she got over him. Not that he didn't still make her mad, by all rights she was still pissed the hell of at him, but she didn't love him any more. The longer she thought, the longer she realized she had only loved the ideas that came with Sam Uley. So one day, she might forgive him…today is not that day.

But her problems don't begin and end with Sam Uley. She has a father who treats her like a doll, too scared to let her see the world and too proud to see the fault in his reasoning. Leah is strong. Leah stands on her own. Leah is a burning fire, dangerous, rash, but constant. Her mother is a kind spirit, but she fawns too much over Seth to see her daughter sinking further into her shield. Not that I can't relate. My mother was too busy with her flighty fancies to parent a child. She ignored me so well that even I got to the point I thought it was normal. Sometimes I wonder how they can be so blind as to not see the suffering of someone they see every day, someone they've known since before birth. It amazes me.

Leah will never be good as new. But none of us ever will. We will never be ignorant of pain nor oblivious to the horrors of the world. We might not be broken, but nothing fits back together perfectly. There are little pieces of ourselves we will never get back, and new pieces that don't quite fit the space left behind. But we don't want perfect, we want human. And by definition, we are imperfect.

Now I bet you're wondering about our little group. How did the bitch, the clown, and the nerd get along without killing one another. It's actually very simple. We don't fit into those categories any more, and we probably never will again. But this should explain it better.

We all have our own exclusive parts within our little group. Leah is the one who was reckless and wild. She talks Quil and I into doing things we never would have done without her. She is the one to tell us when we are being whiny or pathetic. She tells us the cold hard truth no matter how much it would hurt, she is blunt and honest and she is the reason Quil and I aren't still sitting in his living room moping. She is the one who kicks our asses when we're wrong and who fights for us when she can. She got dealt a hard deal in life and she tried to make the best of it. She learned how to breathe under water.

Quil is the one who makes us laugh when we need it and who hugs us when we're upset. He is the one we come to when we need someone calm and collected. He is the one who can go from serious to silly with the snap of a finger. He makes us do stupid things we would all regret later but had fun doing. He is the one who would fight with us when we need to blow off some steam or watch a chick flick just to make us happy. He is our safe harbor and our constant. He knows just what to do to help and even though his friends deserting him forced him to grow up he still knows how to get down and dirty and how to have fun.

My role is harder to describe. Before Leah came along I was the silent comfort, the calm and quiet listener. Now I'm the one who puts Leah in her place and who wrestles with Quil. I'm the one who cooks but I'm not a caretaker. I got over trying to be older than I am. I'm the one who knows how to read and play people. One bat of my eyelashes and a little widening of my innocent eyes can get us places. I'm the one with the inside information about Forks Police Department. I make sure we don't get in trouble. I'm the one who let's others know that if you mess with my friends you mess with me. I don't take orders and I make my own decisions. I'm the one with the connections and I'm definitely the mastermind. I'm the one who will have screaming matches with you when your upset and who will knock your senses back into you. I don't back down and I don't give up. I'm a fighter. Just because I got dealt a raw deal doesn't mean I can stop living. I'm still on top and with my friends on my side I can do anything I want.

I have the most amazing friends in the world and I wouldn't give them up for anything. We all push each other to be the best and still push after. I don't know what would've happened without them. Together we survived.

**Thanks for reading. Reviews are appreciated. This is my first story so I want to know if I should keep writing.**

**~Fictionlover**


	2. Hell Hath No Fury

**Not my characters. I just enjoy playing with them. They belong to SM**

"Bells!"

"Izzy, you bitch, get over here!" And with that lovely statement, I was tackled by two giant Quileute teenagers. It wouldn't have been so bad if Quil hadn't been two hundred pounds of pure muscle. He had been getting taller lately, growing muscles out of nowhere. Hell, he was growing muscles on top of muscles. He looked pretty happy about it though, and who was I to complain? I mean, I got eye-candy and he finally understood the meaning of 'nothing but spring steel and raw hide.' Yeah, happy was one hell of an understatement. But, I digress.

"What's with the Bella sandwich, guys? And Quil, get OFF! I'm seeing my life flash before my eyes." This was seriously starting to get uncomfortable. Leah wasn't so bad, but Quil was squeezing the life right out of me. Ouch. They slowly unwrapped themselves from me and stood up. I sighed and stood as well. The sooner we got this over with the better. I locked eyes with Leah and raised an eyebrow.

"I saw what you did!" Leah was literally bouncing up and down by the end of her sentence. I looked at her a second and decided there was, in fact, absolutely no method to her particular brand of madness. When I zoned back into our conversation she was still jumping and twitching with impatience. You might be asking: what the hell do I do now? Simple. I smacked her and she got that shit under control. She glared at me and I just smirked.

"Yeah we saw! I mean, holy hell girl! You're my new idol!" I turned and saw the funniest expression on his face. I think Quil was contemplating bowing down to me at this point. Not that I really would have minded of course, but I think it would have caused us a bit of unwanted attention. I'll save the thought though, oh the possibilities…

"No kidding, I think I might be in love with you." Okay, that one snapped me back to reality pretty quickly. Leah definitely had _way _too much sugar in her cheerios this morning. My lips curled up into a small smile at my reply.

"Leah, you're hot as hell and all, but I just don't think that you're my type."

"Bitch, you know you want some of this." She even did all of the motions to emphasize her point. Yep, way too much sugar. And then…there was silence, absolute quiet. Quil and I shared a loaded look before we busted out laughing, like full on fist banging rolling on the sand belly laughter. Through all this Leah just stood there looking offended, or at least, she was trying. But before long she was on the ground with us.

It took a minute before we were sane enough to wipe the tears from our eyes. Only Leah. We sat staring at each other for a minute and finally Quil spoke.

"What do you think he's going to do?" He looked a little scared for a minute before he reined it in.

"I have no idea. I'd love to watch but we can't be seen anywhere near there." I sighed as I said this. Oh how I would have loved to see his facial expression in person. Serves the bastard right.

"I think we should go to Port Angeles. The farther away we get, the better."

"Good thinking Leah. I'll call Charlie." I think Quil may have groaned. He knew this meant shopping. But hey, he still chooses to hang out with us. It's his own damn fault.

Next thing we know we're on the highway, speeding off in my truck.

_More like crawling away in a rusted hunk of metal._

Leah! What the hell are you doing in my monologue?

_Eh._

Bitch.

Anyway, as I was saying, Quil was driving us to Port Angeles. Leah was still hyped up and I was alone in the back seat. The trees passed by in a blur of green, bringing back memories that…well, that started my hatred of Sam Uley. I can still remember the exact point in time I had decided I loathed the man. But I remember best the moment I decided there would be hell to pay. I had vowed to make the man's life miserable.

I let myself sink slowly into the memories that resurfaced. I sifted through them until I found the one I wanted and hated to relive. I wanted to replay the hour it all started.

Quil and I had just become acquainted. We were both angry about being fucked over by Sam Uley. I had been hurt and he was furious. It had started when Jacob had ignored me. I knew he wasn't sick. I knew better. I had seen him parading about with Sam, not that he noticed me. Quil and I didn't even say a word to each other. He nodded and I walked past. But I knew. He was being ignored too. I could see the look in his eyes. It was anger that led me to La Push the next morning. That's where this memory starts.

_I was standing in Jacob's driveway. Waiting, always waiting. He had heard me. I knew he had. The grinding truck engine is not easy to miss. No, he knew I was there. He knew._

_And then I saw them. It was the moment that ruined my life as I knew it. I saw them, and I saw _him. _They walked out of the trees silently, gracefully. It should not have been possible for men of that size. They were huge. Each one was over six feet by at least a couple of inches. Muscles seemed to pile on top of one another, not disgustingly, but each boy-man had a six pack and muscles I didn't even know existed. I looked closely at the boys. I recognized only two of them._

_He had his back to me, but I knew who he was. Sam Uley. I was almost out cold when he found me, but I recognize him. He was different from the others. Though still tall and muscled, there was a distinction. Where the others were bulky and awkward, he was leaner and more fluid. Instead of being a bear, he was a wolf, nothing obnoxious or extra about him. I can still remember the way he walked with that sinuous stride, the way he stood with his head held high, as if he knew something no one else did. He had spoken so softly to me, and carried me back home as carefully as he could, like I was broken glass. His soothing hum had made the pain stop, if only for a moment. I had thought he was a decent guy. I was painfully wrong. _

_The other that stands out is a tall lanky boy. Though much bigger than when I saw him last, he was familiar. Embry. The only thing missing is his shy smile, but it's nowhere to be seen. It was then that I realized something. I was no longer looking at Embry, who was innocent and sweet and so very shy. I was looking at a clone._

_Seeing them, I knew what had happened. Jacob had told me enough to know this. I had lost him. He wasn't my Jacob anymore. He was Sam's lackey now. I gasped when he came through the trees last, even though I had prepared myself. He was so much taller, and, like the others, he had muscles he hadn't had a week ago. The sweet smile on his face was gone and in its place was a cold glare. Yes, he was Sam's now. There was no hope for me, or for him._

_Jake said something to Sam under his breath and Sam nodded before clapping him on the shoulder in the universal sign of good luck. Jake just stood and watched as one by one each of the other four boys disappeared between the trees._

_Sam looked emotionless as he turned and walked towards the woods without even glancing at me. He was the last to leave. No, no 'I'm sorry' s or even 'fuck you' s. When he was out of sight I turned back to my former best friend, even though I could feel their eyes on me. It hurt a lot to know that he chose Sam and his gang over me, that I had no warning. They even had to watch Jake and I talk. Did the man have no chivalry? _

_I knew I wasn't perfect, in fact I was far from it, but he could have at least told me. I knew he was frustrated and sad for me, but he was my best friend. I hid the tears threatening to spill and looked up at him. Then I had an idea, a horrible cruel idea. He needed to see what he did, the scar he would leave on my heart. I let the tears fall slowly down my cheeks, one fat drop of salt water after the other in rivers. They were silent tears, but no words were needed. My face said it all._

_I watched as his eyes softened and he opened his mouth. Then I realized something else. I was not made to be broken. I was not going to let him crush me. No. I'm not just hurt, I'm mad. I'm not only raving mad, I'm furious. He would _not _break me._

_He was scared of them, of becoming one of _them_. Now he is just another one of Sam Uley's fucking disciples. He was good. He was innocent. Sam ruined that. I glared at the woods, knowing they would see me. I didn't know how or why, I just knew._

_Well, I would make Jacob Black scared of _me_ when I'm done with him._

_"I hope you realize what you've done. There will be no going back after this. I hope this memory haunts you for the rest of your miserable life. I want you to burn this memory into your soul. Look at me." I watched his head drop as the weight seemed to hit him. "I said LOOK AT ME!" His head snapped up then. He stared right at me, his own eyes watering as he watched the tears still seeping from my eyes. "This will be the last time I cry for you. This will be the last time I look at you with any emotion other than hate or resentment. This is your last chance. You chose him. You knew the consequences and you let him rule over you. You have power and you let him take it away. You are the future chief of this tribe but you take orders from him. You have already lost a follower, a follower and two friends who loved you. I know you know what you did to Quil, and now to me." I wasn't sure about Quil but I was almost sure. And by the fleeting look of guilt I saw cross his face I knew I was right. He had done the same to Quil. Huh. I'm better at reading people than I thought. I started to walk away, proud of myself for keeping calm. It was all very anticlimactic really. Or, at least it was, until Jacob started to speak again._

_"Bella, please…"_

"_SHUT THE HELL UP JAKE!" I yelled._

_"Bella."_

_"I said SHUT UP! I know you know what it feels like, being dropped like garbage by someone you trusted. I know you know how much it hurts. So why would you do it to me? To Quil? I trusted you with everything I had. I gave you a piece of my heart, and this is what happens. I have learned my lesson. My heart won't win again." I was breathing hard now, waiting for the response I knew would come._

_"And you don't think I regret that, that I've had it hard too?" Oh, so he wanted to play that game._

_"You want me to have sympathy for you? Even after this? You think you deserve any comfort from me? That's the biggest load of shit of I've ever heard. You don't deserve my pity. Not after this." I think he gave up then, his face crumbling. I had a brief flash of regret, but it was gone almost as soon as it appeared. "I loved you, Jake. Maybe not the way you wanted, but I loved you. I know you didn't understand. I know, but you tried anyway. What happened to the boy I knew? What happened to the sixteen year old boy with the bright smile and the innocent eyes? What happened to my best friend? Because you certainly aren't him." And with that I left. I didn't even spare him another look. I was gone. I was done with him. Done with this. And then, I ran. _

And that was the precise moment I decided I hated Sam Uley with a fiery passion. That was the moment something changed inside of me, a switch flipped. I wasn't weak, I wasn't worthless, and I was only as helpless as I made myself. I was in control now. Confidence surged through me and I knew. I knew I would win. Sam Uley killed the innocent boy I knew and replaced him. He took away my best friend and he would live to regret it. Of that I would make sure. Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.

**Thanks for reading.**

**~Fictionlover**


	3. We'll Fight Dirty

I was jerked out of my lovely memories with Leah's oh so elegant,

"Fuck!" Now, this was nothing new, in fact you can never really be surprised with her, but what she was looking at _was _indeed something new. Fuck was just about right. In the rearview mirror was the one thing I really, really didn't want to see today.

"Fuck, indeed." I really wanted to smack him, full on deck him, he wouldn't even see it coming. Quil certainly knew how to piss me off. Not that I wasn't already mad as hell, if we're being fair. But I'm not angry, oh no, I'm about to flip my damn lid and shit is going to fly. Honestly it's almost pathetic that this is the response to two half-naked Indian boys. The only two I didn't know personally, coincidence? I think not. Paul and Jared? Yah, they were definitely not here for a pleasure visit. How did I know this? Well, not that it was obvious or anything you know. I only figured it out through my brilliant observational skills. Yeah, I could fucking see their glares through the rearview mirror.

I saw Leah open her mouth to ask but I shot her a quick look. When you hung around the supernatural as much as I did you pick up on things. The Cullens taught me that, probably one of the only useful things I ever leaned from them. I don't know what Sam's little dolls are, but I know they're not as human as the rest of us. No, if Leah spoke they would hear. It didn't matter if they were in a separate car a few feet behind us, they would hear. Now I bet I know what you're thinking. It is probably something along the lines of 'What the fuck is this girl on?' or it might be just the standard 'What the fuck?' Honestly I don't blame you. So we'll have to start at the beginning. Oh how I love stories….

Truth number one: The Cullens are vampires. This entails that they can do all sorts of fucked up shit and us puny little humans have no say if our asses get eaten or not. Not that I blame them for that. It's kind of like a mosquito, now I hate the pesky little fuckers but that doesn't mean I have the urge to go and destroy them all. I don't, not really, because that's vindictive and judgmental. I may be a bitch but I won't begrudge them for living the only way they know how. No, what pisses me off is that they are so careless about what they do and whom they hurt in the process. Don't they have moral standards? They _were _humans once, right?

Maybe not. I wouldn't know.

Vampires, by definition, are not humans. They do not act like humans and they do not think like humans. This means that no matter how hard they try, want, wish, whatever, they cannot be human. They should not go around pretending to be for their own stupid thrill or amusement. You don't see me eating grass and mooing do you? No, I didn't think so. I'm not completely mental yet, not saying it won't happen, but I'm not quite at that point yet.

Anyway, back to vampires. Now, I think we all know that the garlic and stakes thing is a load of shit. But if it isn't clear, let me make it. If you shove garlic in a vampire's face, yes, they will wrinkle their nose. No, they will not stay away and many would kill you for having shoved it at them in the first place, those that don't would laugh so hard you would think they would suffocate. Now, thrust a wooden stake at them? I dare you. That would splinter against diamond hard skin and you would be a juice box before you had the brain capacity to think 'Oh shit.' Yeah. It doesn't work. Don't go all Buffy on their asses. They WILL kill you. They do NOT need and invitation to enter your house. That is some poor fucker's wishful thinking. They will eat you in your sleep. They really don't have many standards.

Vampires have diamond hard skin that sparkles in the sunlight like a fucking fairy. But don't mention that. It's a bit of a sore spot. They have unparalleled reflexes and senses. They will sneak up on you before you have time to take a step. Hell, they could probably smell what you had for lunch on your breath long after you've eaten it and brushed your teeth six times just to get the taste from your mouth. They are fast little motherfuckers and strong too. If you see a five-foot female with red eyes walking down the street, I repeat, do NOT approach or attack her. She will have you on her ass, just where she wants you. They are literally indestructible. Except, yes, there is an except, for fire. Now, fire doesn't burn them, no effect really…unless you have a source of venom. Vampire venom is ridiculously flammable, not sure why, but it is. If they have an open wound, go for it, if not, you're screwed.

Now, if we use the Cullens as an example, and we will, they are fairly 'civilized' compared to others of their kind, not to mention much more practiced in the art of blending in with humans. But even immortals make mistakes. Especially fucking idiots like the Cullens.

Sometimes you would hear Edward answer a thought instead of a question, a hundred years not practice enough to talk out loud in the presence of humans? One too many times they would move slightly faster than humans are able. Once again, aren't vampires supposed to have infallible memory? And then there were 'the conversations'. Now, these are what I was trying to get to. The conversations are when a vampire talks too fast and low for a human to hear. Now, I learned how to recognize it. They would look at each other for a few moments in silence, or at least what _I_ heard was silence. Really, they would just be vibrating their lips at impossible speeds to get a point across when they didn't want me to hear. Bastards. Now I could see these movements of their lips but I didn't call them out on it. Where would the fun in that be? I wanted to learn all I could about them and just watching and pretending to be oblivious was a good way to do it. I wasn't as much of a self-absorbed teenage girl as I had them believe.

But back to the Indians. I knew they weren't humans because they would have those conversations. They always had the knowing look in their eye and some of them even felt superior…*cough* Paul *cough*…and they all seemed to be so in tune with each other. If one moves they all move. They compensate for any openings and they move into positions only apparent in vampires or animals, creatures that run off of instinct. Yeah, so NOT human. Why not just get sign and arrows already?

So yes, if we spoke they would hear us. So I did the easy thing. I didn't speak, I took action.

I did the only logical thing to do at this point. Now I bet you are thinking that this is where our ragtag little group pulls the car over to the side of the road and faces our enemy head on where we have a standoff and a heartfelt speech. Well, that or a gunfight. Or maybe where one of us admits we were wrong and everything is all of a sudden rainbows and bunnies and other cuddly shit. Well, I'll be the first to say that you are absolutely fucking _wrong_. I flipped them off as I pushed Leah out of the way and my foot found the gas. I stomped that bitch down and we were off like bats out of hell.

"I can't believe you just did that." Leah's face was hilarious. Her jaw was hanging open and her eyes were dinner plates. She would be laughing if she hadn't been so shocked. I snapped a quick picture. What? That face is priceless. I do like to have blackmail.

"Seeing is believing. And if I recall correctly, you had a front row seat." Leah pouted as I said this. I think she sometimes regrets teaching me how to be a bitch.

"I'm still reeling over the prank you pulled on Sam to be surprised at anything right now. How did you get all of his furniture on his roof in the first place?" Oh, yeah, that. I still wish I could have seen his face. But I guess I should probably answer Quil's question.

"It took a bit of stealth, I'll tell you that much. About how I got it on the roof, you probably don't want to know. But I do have to say, they have wicked senses of hearing and smell. Which is why I had to wait until it rained. I didn't need to leave proof it was me. It took some work." Oh, but it was fun. And so worth it.

"I bet his face was priceless." Leah had a wistful tone to her voice. Yeah. I fucking know. That shit needed to be videoed.

"So why do you think dumb and dumber were following us?" I was kinda curious, I mean there was the obvious reason, but they could have just told Charlie.

"Um, I don't think it was us they were following. I think it's me." Quil say what?

"What do you mean?" Oh shit. Leah's furious. You can tell by the steely calm in her voice and the way her eyes turned hard.

"I mean I've been feeling eyes on me all week and one of them always just _happens _to be around when I go somewhere. It's fucking creepy. I don't want to end up like Jake and Embry, following his every order. I don't want to leave you guys." No more had to be said. We all knew who _he _was. I wish we could have done something to make him feel better, to help him. But there was nothing that could be done, and I think he knew it too. But I refused to lose another friend to him. I wasn't going down without a fight. And by the look on Leah's face she agreed.

"We'll fight for you. If it comes down to it we'll fight for you. And we'll fight dirty. Those assholes won't know what hit them." I was ready. Bring it on, Uley. We'll see who comes out on top. You haven't seen anything yet.

**Thanks for reading. Reviews are appreciated. And everything belongs to SM.**

**And a special thanks to NeedCoffeeINeedItOrI'llExpload for help with Bella's prank on Sam.**

**~Fictionlover**


	4. Copious Amounts of Alcohol Later

**Not my characters. They belong to SM. I just like making them dance. Muah ha ha ha.**

After our _incident _with Sam's guard dogs we decided that going back to Forks didn't sound very appealing. Not that I'm one to complain but Quil was whining like a bitch about being followed by the fuck-ups. So Leah and I, being the great and loving people we are, decided to let his ass stew for a little bit while we planned. Not that we wanted to go back either, but he didn't need to know that. So I dialed Charlie and waited for the answer I knew would be coming.

"Hello?"

"Hi, dad."

"Bells?"

"Yah." Who else would it be? I think I should know if someone else is calling him dad. Unless it's some kinky shit. Then I really don't want to know. I had to suppress a shudder at that thought.

"Ya need somethin', baby girl?"

"Quil, Leah, and I feel like we really need a break from Forks. We just want the weekend away, new scenery and all. We wanted to know if you're okay with us staying in Seattle for a long weekend."

"Uh huh. Ya think this is gonna save yer ass from Uley?" Well, shit. How the fuck did he know that?

"I'm sorry, um what?" I really hoped it was innocence in my voice and not the smug undercurrent I was feeling.

"Don't ya bullshit me, young lady. I'm not so old yet." Shit.

"I love you daddy?" I made it sound like a question. Huh.

"Ya better, baby girl, ya better."

"How did you know?"

"I may be yer old man, but I'm not quite so blind as to miss this." The old man sees more than I give him credit for. How did he miss Edward then? Or did he?

"So you'll cover for me?" I let the hope in m voice saturate the phone. He just chuckled.

"I'll protect yer sorry ass this once." He went to college in Georgia. He talks like this when he's really mad, or really fucking amused. Bastard.

"Aww, I knew I loved you for some reason."

"Now, now. No need ta snap at yer old man, Bells. Have fun."

"Make sure to make up some story for Leah and Quil."

"Yes, ma'am. Can't have ya'll getting in anymore trouble can I?" And people wonder where I get my observational skills. Well, that, the cussing, and the sarcasm. My daddy is one sorry excuse for an example. Not that he was around much, so really it's got to be Renee.

"No need to be like that. It was only a little fun."

"A little fun my ass. He's gonna be pissed at this one. And when this backfires, I'm gonna be watching the flames."

"Hardy har fucking har."

"My daughter speaks like a sailor, I'm so proud."

"You should be, it's not about to go away. Plus, I'm completely blaming it on you."

"Sure, sure. Bye Bells." Old man was still laughing when he hung up. Asshole. But I inherited his assholeness, or the female equivalent. Well, he's my dad. And with that I turned to Leah and flashed a smile.

"All clear." Quil's head snapped up and I swear he was going to kiss me. Or Leah. Luckily Leah caught him and straightened him the fuck out. If he had made it he would be walking with a limp for a while. I almost laughed aloud at the thought. What? It's something to keep in mind. It could be useful. Maybe.

"I fucking love your dad." Leah smirked as she turned back towards me. We dissolved into laughter.

"So my darlings, what are we going to do on our little weekend away?" The car was parked and we had no plan. A thousand ideas rushed through my head, but even Quil could have anticipated Leah's answer to my question.

"I propose we get fucked up."

"Thank you for that brilliant idea Leah…anyone else? Quil?"

"Hey! What the hell was wrong with my suggestion?"

"Oh, it was great…you know, other than the fact that none of us are twenty one." I may have snapped…just a little bit.

"Well, damn." Well said, Leah.

"Um, guys? I hate to encourage this, but you guys are fucking hot. I'm sure you can get us in wherever we want to go."

"Oh sure you hate to encourage it. But you have a point. Leah?"

"I hate to admit it but shit-for-brains actually came up with an idea." And we were out of the car before Quil could protest.

Yes, it was an idea indeed. It was unanimously decided later that it was a bad fucking idea and that Leah should never ever be allowed near copious amounts of alcohol and men at the same time. Never fucking ever again. Not that we remembered the last bit until much later, as in, my head isn't being split open, I'm not violently puking anymore, and think I could maybe drink some coffee, kind of later. So yes, not a lot was done until much, much later in the day. It was a long weekend though, thank god for small miracles. I didn't need Charlie on my case about how utterly fucked-up I looked. Yeah, that wouldn't go over well. I happen to like what little sunlight Forks has to offer. Not that he'd be _that_ pissed off. I've got stuff on him from his teenage years he'll never live down. Never smoked pot my ass.

I pulled myself up and pried my crusted 150 lb eyelids and closed them again immediately. Too fucking bright. Once I stumbled my way to my bag and downed my aspirin I chanced another look around the room. What I saw would have made me laugh if I didn't think my head would collapse in on itself. Leah was passed out on the couch with a bottle of whiskey. An _empty_ bottle of whiskey. She's going to be one hell of a pissy bitch when she wakes up. I've got the baseball bat hidden though. Just in case.

She looks a hot mess though. Her long raven hair is splayed across the arm of aforementioned couch and the smudged dark make-up on her face gives a hint to our whereabouts last night. The crumpled aqua mini dress was riding up on her thighs and her strappy silver heels were hanging from the fan. How the fuck did those get there? Not that anyone can remember much of anything anyway. Back to the sleeping bitch…um beauty? Her mouth is hanging open slightly and she's snoring. Though that's not quite as bad as the drool. She had a hell of a night. She probably out-drank every male in the club. I'm so proud to call her my best friend. What good times we have.

Now Quil? Quil is the typical hung-over male, cursing, stumbling, and louder cursing. Though I have to give him credit. He didn't wake Leah up, so at least we know he can think somewhat rationally. I'd put my heel up his ass if he even thought about it, but he still gets some brownie points. Or at least he had some…until he fell on top of Leah anyway. Oh shit. That motherfucking dumb-assed whore-licking kiss-ass…it went on that way for a while. Long story short, I was going to kill him. Slowly. Painfully. I will castrate him with a rusted spork. Not spoon, spoons are boring. After that I will hang him by his toes and make him watch as I light his funeral pyre. Then there was the gasoline and the tires. It was totally an A-Team copy, but I think it could still work. Then finally I will spit on his ashes and laugh.

When I came out of my homicidal moment Leah was beating the shit out of Quil. I watched for a moment before I figured I should probably do something, but it was just too entertaining. Plus, he deserved it. In the end I had to pull her off of him and she complained. Loudly. So I told her to shut the fuck up and to save the aggression for Uley.

After we got our shit together we all took showers and brushed our teeth. After this was accomplished with only mild cursing and a few screaming matches we all promptly passed the fuck back out.

My last thought before succumbing to the talking butterflies and the bridge people was mildly sadistic as well as bitchy, but somehow he deserved it all. The bastard was a fucking idiot. Anyway, it was this: When Leah remembers what happened in the bar last night, I hope she unleashes hell on Uley's ass. He's fucked six ways from Sunday and that's before Quil and I even get a stab at him. Look out Uley, Leah's a-comin' and she won't rest until your balls are in her possession. Good luck, fucker. I'm about to be a hella entertained.

**As always, thanks for reading. Now I know nothing really happens in this chapter, but rest assured it sets things up perfectly for the next one. We will be finding out more about their night out and what exactly Sam did to piss Leah off. Not that it would take much, I'm sure, but whatever it is, he's in a load trouble.**

**Reviews are appreciated.**

**~Fictionlover**


	5. Someone Hand Me A Flamethrower

**Characters are not mine. Just their new personalities. **

Chapter 5

Now that my brain is functioning above cave-human levels again, I think you need to be caught up. Now, I bet you're wondering about the thing that must have crawled up Leah's ass, right? Yes, she is fucking pissed off and bitchy. Yes, she is out for blood and various other body parts. And yes, it is Sam Uley's fault. But then again, why wouldn't it be? Big surprise right?

_LAST NIGHT_

Now, if you hadn't guessed it, Leah takes her drinking very seriously. Well, as serious as Leah gets. If you really hadn't seen this coming, then you are officially ridiculously unobservant. The woman was on a fucking mission. Now, I don't mean she's not going to have fun, not at all, I mean in the 'if I'm going to fucking drink, I'm damn well not going to be remembering it tomorrow" kind of drunk. And yes, she actually did say that. Bitch was completely serious too. But, then again, this is Leah. It's funny how that really does explain _everything_.

Her Highness is just lucky that she's a looker. I think (or am really fucking sure) we would've gotten a whole different result if she weren't fucking gorgeous. The poor bouncer didn't stand a chance against her curve hugging dress and her fluttering eyes, not to mention the girl's voice. She oozes sex. Needless to say we managed to get into the club without a problem. (Though the bouncer had a bit of one.)

Of course, being inside was a whole new curve ball. First things first, Operation Find Leah is go. Bitch disappeared as soon as we were through the doors. The girl moves fucking fast when she wants to, I'll give her that. The downside is that I now have to track her ass down before my IQ drops any lower just by being in the same vicinity as Quil.

After shoving my way through sweaty bodies and perverted men with grubby hands, I found Leah. And, of course, she was at the bar with a drink in her hands. Whiskey. Straight. Once again, bitch. What was she thinking, leaving me all alone…with Quil…alone? And how the in hell did she even get the alcohol? Aw, fuck it. As long as she works some magic to grab some for me, I really don't care.

The second thing I noticed was that the woman was surrounded by awed men of all ages. Not that I blame them, Leah is looking fucktastic in her skin-tight aqua mini-dress. The girl is all radiant native beauty. The long black hair trails down her back in messy layers and her russet skin literally glows in the low lights. Lucky bitch. Yeah, she was getting drooled over by horny creatures of the male species, Quil included. So, what did I do? I stormed right up to her and pulled her into my arms. Then I planted one on her lips. I was completely expecting to get tossed on my ass. But this is Leah, so, of course, she had to do the unexpected. Yeah, she kissed me back. Well, what the hell? Alright, I guess. If she's going to play along, might as well make it a bit of a show. So we stood making out heavily for another minute before we were pulled from each other by some pissed off man.

I looked up and met eyes with the hard hazel orbs of none other than Paul Lahote. Well, shit. Just like Sam to send his cronies to ruin our night. I glared right back at the idiot with my own 'fuck off' look. The man is such a fucking bitch. Ugh. Of course, then he smirks at me. If only he knew the thoughts going through my head. When my glare turned up a notch, so did the mirth in his eyes. Humph. Well then.

"Bitch. Who the hell do you think you are, fucking up our little night out?" Let's see how he takes that little comment. It's my turn to smirk when I see his lips turn up into a snarl and watch his hands start to shake.

"Who are you calling a bitch, you little slut? Plus, this is fucking illegal." Oh HELL no.

"If you're calling me a slut, you're stuck further up Uley's ass than I thought. And since when did you care about legal?"

"Why you ungrateful little shrew! If you only knew…" Paul was cut off by another boy, who I hadn't seen standing in the shadows before that moment. I squinted, trying to look for familiar features. I almost laughed when I recognized him. There really is something fucked up in the water down there. Why can't the stupid fucking supernatural just leave me the hell alone? I mean come on! I got screwed over by a vampire and have massive boys stalking my friends and I. The next thing I know, I'm going to piss off the microscopic fucking flower fairies that live in Charlie's attic. But, back to the boy. I wanted to laugh just looking at him.

"Well, fuck a duck and call me crazy! Embry Call, what did you do to deserve putting up with this dickwad?" Embry just blushed. Hmmm. Maybe Sam hadn't completely ruined him…yet. Always with the yet. Bastards.

"I broke Jacob's nose…" I was ready to congratulate him until I realized he wasn't done. "And then I might have, maybe, caught Sam a little off guard when I threw a tree at him." He said really quietly. I could have kissed him…until I realized SOMEONE had beat me too it. Bitch. Though, I had been wondering where Leah had gone. The look on Embry's face is hilarious. He looks shocked and pleased with a side of 'what the hell?' all fighting for dominance on his face.

"And this was a problem because?" Ah, Quil. Got to love him.

"Because, dipshit, people don't like being hit with trees!" Yeah. That one was courtesy of my sarcastic ass.

"Well damn, I thought he already had one up his ass. What's the big deal?" Leah had the doe eyes out big time. Innocent my ass. Quil and I giggled like schoolgirls while Embry tried to stifle his chuckles. Even Paul was shaking with the effort it took him not to laugh. Oh, Leah.

"Aw, hell. You girls just got bumped up a notch on fucking respect." Wow. Respect. From Embry. Not worth much.

"It's nice that our wit is appreciated. Sometimes I think Quil falls a little short."

"Leah, you're such a bitch!"

"Quil, it wasn't bothering you yesterday, or even an hour ago. Don't tell me you just now realized this." Their little argument was interrupted by the shrill ringing of Paul's cell phone. He looked at it a minute before sighing.

"Yes?"

"No."

"What the hell, Jared?"

"Fucking hell! What do you want me to do?"

"I don't care if he doesn't like it, it's not my problem."

"Why is he so protective of them? I know he's showing signs, but…"

"Fuck. She's back?"

"I'll take care of it." He sighed and looked at us slowly.

"Shit. I'm going to regret this later." Huh? What the hell was he going on abou…umph. I was thrown over Paul's shoulder quickly and facing Leah, who, coincidentally, was on Paul's other shoulder. Quil was just being dragged along by Embry.

"What the hell, Paul?" It was nice of Leah to ask the question on everyone's mind.

"Sam's orders." He said it like it explained everything. Sadly, it did. I'm going to kill that motherfucking bitch. Someone hand me a damn flamethrower.

"Wow, when did you get violent, Bella?" What?

"Embry, did I say that out loud?"

"Yes." Bastards. I've got to stop doing that.

"Where exactly did Sam tell you to take us?"

"He didn't. Jared just said orders were to get you off the streets."

"Can't you ignore these 'orders'?"

"No." It was said in tandem.

"How about you put us on our feet outside the club and we promise not to go back in?"

"Not good enough," Paul said with a slight sigh.

"What about you take us to the bar across the street from our hotel and we promise to get inside before midnight?"

"That could work." Embry got a small smile on his face. They started walking. When they set us down in front of the small building, they turned to go. Paul suddenly froze and turned around slowly.

"You should have taken your own safety into account. And you would do well to remember that Sam is important on the reservation. Bella, you've been temporarily banned from the reservation by the elders. And Quil will be confined to La Push. Leah, you are free to roam, but neither of you are to have any contact with Quil." Oh hell no. Wait, why Quil and not Leah? Why are we allowed to see each other, but not him? I turned to yell back, but they were gone. Just gone.

END of NIGHT

So, in summary, we got drunk off our asses and Leah started some bar fights. And then she flirted. A lot. Quil and I dragged her away with her alcohol still in hand. Bitch is never drinking again unless I get to be drunk first.

Still, Leah is fucking pissed and with good reason. Hell, even Quil is pissed off for me. Banned from the rez? Damn, Uley is more of an ass than I thought, and he was up there on my dick meter. And what the fuck about Quil? Can't see us? I don't fucking think so. Uley can kiss my skinny lily-white ass.

But, back to Leah. Leah is going to eat Uley for breakfast and use his bones as toothpicks. She is going to wear his spine as a necklace. I just hope she has the sense to use ketchup. Everything tastes better with ketchup. _Maybe_ even Sam Uley.

**Sorry about the delay. School has been busy. Also my format wasn't working yesterday when I tried to post this, so sorry about the false alarm.**

**~Fictionlover**


	6. Postcards From Albania

Two weeks. Two fucking weeks since we had heard from Quil. No phone calls, no letters, no visits. Not even a fucking postcard from Albania, or wherever the hell else he could have gone. He just disappeared. Gone. Evaporated. I don't know, something. Or, at least, it seemed like he had. He would have at least called if he could. The Quil I knew would have fought tooth and nail to tell Leah and me he was okay. In my head I pictured ropes and a gag. Maybe even pointy things. He was being threatened. There was no other explanation. I refuse to believe Quil left us. Not like Edward. Not like Jake. Not like Sam. Quil wouldn't turn is back on us. Not for Uley. Not on Leah and me. Not after everything. No, there was something else at work here. Something big. Something secret. Something supernatural. Something dangerous. I am going to get answers, banned from La Push or not. Fuck Sam Uley and his ass-kissing connection to the tribal elders.

That was the pep-talk I gave myself before I ended up in front of Quil's house with no back-up. Damn Leah and her stupid fucking shopping. In California. On vacation. Shit, I cuss a lot. Aw hell, when did I get this bad? Oh well. I'm blaming Leah. Girl has a mouth that a sailor would wash out with bleach. I don't know where the hell she comes up with some of this stuff. Anyway, I was waiting in front of the cute blue house in my trusty beast, alone, all by myself…alone. Sigh. I hate you Leah and I'm bludgeoning you to death with your fucking checkbook when you get home. Oh, if only I could laugh at the irony, unfortunately my ears wouldn't be the only ones to hear my hysterical laughter.

Here goes nothing. Wait, hold on, fuck that shit. Who came up with the phrase "here goes nothing"? Whoever it was, it was a damn imbecile. Here goes something. Here goes the whole damn operation. I open my truck door with my newly over-inflated confidence and step out silently, waiting. I could feel their eyes on my back. I sat down on the steps and shrugged. So be it, assholes. I'm not going away. They're going to regret the day they pissed off Bella Swan. I aimed my glare at the trees and smirked as I heard some squirming. Needless to say, I didn't have to wait much longer. All too soon, the head bastard himself appeared from the bushes and walked towards me, eyes blazing. Fucking bush-hiding best-friend stealing asshole.

I watched as his lean muscular body stalked up to me, cautiously, as if I were a scared animal. He circled me, looking for a weakness, a break in my resolve. He reminded me of the wolves his tribe descended from, a beast that couldn't be tamed. He closed in on me and the predatory look in his eyes seemed different up close, hungry and volatile. The black swirls of his eyes met mine, and for a second, when they flashed a golden amber, I could see something inside him, something dangerous and absolutely wild lurking just under the surface.

Something had changed and Sam was no longer in control. There was raw primal need in his eyes, an ancient longing. I shivered in response, my own body reacting to this age-old dance it seemed to know. I was captured in those feral wanting eyes and it was _right. _And then, as suddenly as it was there, his eyes hardened again, smoldering black coals where a wildfire had once burned, and my glimpse of that other mysterious and primal nature was gone. And somehow, that hurt somewhere deep in my very being, like a piece of me had been ripped away before I even knew it was there. And I hated him for it, both inflicting it and taking it from me all at once.

I stood to meet him and almost gasped when I realized we were close enough that I could feel his chest heaving. A snarl spilled from his lips as my fiery gaze was once again trapped in his. He looked at me with a hard expression and said the ten words that would break me. "I am not who you think I am, little girl." The growl in his words caused a reaction in the inner most workings of my mind. I know I should have been afraid. That swirl of amber in his eyes and his deep growl should have sent the message. And yet, I found myself longing for something I couldn't name, for an idea that was so simple that it was elusive and hard to grasp. So I stood there as he walked away, slowly and deliberately, not saying a word. Those words of his started to seep into my consciousness and brand themselves into my memory. I simply stared as he melted into the woods, leaving nothing but the light swish of leaves behind him.

I don't know how long I must have stood there frozen, just staring after a shadow. I didn't have much chance to wonder as I was broken out of my dazed silence when Paul sidled up next to me and spoke in my ear. "Nothing to say?" Thankfully, my brain jumpstarted and I was armed with a comeback.

"Oh darlin', I had a whole speech planned, but I believe it's above your brain capacity and I wouldn't want to waste my breath on you. I would run out of small words." And just like that, the heavy silence was broken and laughter surrounded us as the others came up behind us.

I scanned their faces hurriedly, looking for a face I knew would be there, and one I dreaded seeing. He stood slightly back, looking at the ground with slumped shoulders, but I would know him anywhere. He was the same, and so very different. He looked so alone and guilty, and when he looked at me I could feel the regret blooming between us. I was walking before the others knew to stop me. I paused right in front of him and searched his eyes. There was shouting in the background, but I ignored it altogether. He looked so lost, so broken, and yet, there was a weight that seemed to be taken from his shoulders. He offered me a hand and I brushed it lightly before pushing it aside. He barely had time to look hurt and accepting before my arms wrapped around him. I knew I was crying, even before I heard his sharp intake of breath. I hadn't cried since that first day. His arms crushed me to him and he simply held me as I cried. I stayed in his embrace for a minute before I pulled back lightly and wiped away the traitor tears. I looked back up at him, barely aware that we still had an audience.

"You're not coming back, are you?"

"No. There's no going back from this. I have no choice." He looked so brokenhearted and ashamed, but the fire in his eyes told me he was telling the truth. He wouldn't lie to me. He just didn't expect me to believe him. Silly, foolish boy.

"I won't say goodbye. Not to you too." Quil looked up quickly at my words. His expression was all it took. He was so hopeful and confused. "Though, I am demanding a phone call at least once a week. One more thing: No lies. Not ever. I don't care if you can't tell me, if you can't I won't push, but I don't want a bullshit story. Deal?" I even attempted to give him a watery smile as I presented my hand.

He smiled at me and brought his hand up to wipe away the last remaining tears on my face. He brushed my hand aside, much like I had done to his, and wrapped me in a warm hug. He raised his right hand and said what I should have been expecting.

"Scout's honor." I elbowed him and gave him one last hug before turning to leave. There was so much more to this than I thought. It goes so much deeper. And mostly, it was Uley's last words that played on repeat in my head. _"I am not who you think I am, little girl." _Even my dreams were haunted with those black and amber-gold eyes. _"I am not who you think I am."_

Now, I just had to break the news to Leah. Fuck my life.


	7. Red Pill

Why does this shit happen to me? Why can't my life be normal? Logical? Belong to someone else? I should have taken the damn blue pill, I would've woken up in my bed none the wiser and happily oblivious. But no, I _had _to take the fucking_ red_ pill. Damn asshole vampires and their sparkling pansy asses pulling me into the supernatural world with their motherfucking allure. If I ever see the Cullens again, I'm shoving Eddie's mini disco stick so far up his ass that not even Alice will know when he'll be able to remove it. Useless fucking bitch.

Okay. So I'm in a mood and sitting in the middle of the woods by myself…in the rain. No judging. It's not like I planned on being here with the need to hit a couple of trees. But believe me, PMS + Leah is not exactly the formula for unicorns and fucking rainbows. At All. Ever. Even worse is PMS + Leah + Telling her that Quil has joined the army of clones. I thought she might be in a good mood after her three-week vacation. I was wrong. Yeah. Never again. Bitch needs some ice cream and a hug. ASAFP. Where is Quil when you need him? He would have taken her wrath away from me. But seriously, Leah has serious female issues that are pissing me (and everyone else in the vicinity) off. Bitch.

And, there also, maybe, might have been my constant dreams of black and amber eyes adding to my mood. There is something missing, something I am missing in this tangled web of secrets. And there was something I had found in the feral amber eyes of Sam Uley. A piece of me was ripped away and devoured the moment he looked at me, and at the same time I felt a twining in my being, something new being attached to me. He had known, just as I had known, the moment I lost control, the moment something else took over, an ancient instinct. That part of me, that overpowering need and longing, knew I belonged to him. I had submitted. At least, my body was on its way when Sam once again had control. His coal eyes had snapped me out of my trance. And then, of course, he had to make it worse.

Those words, those haunting confusing words. _I am not who you think I am. _Those words have been taking over my thoughts for a month. Who is he? Who is he that my body betrays me and I ache when he is away? Who is this man that awakened this hidden longing and who is so wrapped in mystery and power? Who is Sam Uley that I can't get those eyes to leave me alone? They shadow my steps and haunt my own eyes. My mind's eye puts them everywhere, always watching me with that animalistic gaze.

Hence, why I'm in the forest. Alone. Yeah, okay, not so smart. What the hell ever. Sitting on a broken tree isn't going to kill me. I just need some time alone. Some time away from the fucking supernatural. For once, I want absolute and total silence so that I can think. I'll be fine in the woods. Or, at least, that's what I was telling myself. I just wanted to be alone. I won't let my fucked up memories drag me down this time.

I let the rain hit my face as I turned my eyes to the clouds. I was simply remembering, remembering and accepting the past. What more was there to do? I haven't been alone in so long, never got the chance to wave it all goodbye. I finally got to watch my past go up in smoke, but deep down I knew that I would always have a scar, and maybe that is what hurt the most. I let a single tear slide down my cheek for the future I lost. And then, I looked up into the sky and let the rain drown the bitter harpy that was still ripping open the wounds in my chest.

Of course, I was also trying to run from the ache, the pull in my chest. The pain was getting worse, something was tugging my insides out through a needle point, and I couldn't stop it.

I simply closed my eyes and drifted away from my body. I stood and looked at myself through someone else's eyes. I looked like a fallen child, a broken girl. Or maybe it was the look of a girl who was just put back together. The girl I was looking at was something people cry at when they see. Ebony hair wild and strewn around her olive skin, pasted to her face. Eyes closed and hands limp at her sides, she could be dead. She is broken.

I snapped back to myself quickly, honey eyes wrenching open. I am NOT broken. I am strong. I am a survivor. I am Bella Fucking Swan and I refuse to let myself return to that shy, clumsy, pathetic little brat. What am I doing breaking down about nothing? I'm worth more than this. And what the fuck is with the ebony hair and olive skin? I knew I had Quileute heritage, but I didn't know it was obvious. I mean, Charlie told me that his grandparents were native, but I knew that he took after his mother. I thought I took after mine. Joke's on me, I guess. I finally grew into myself, but I could have sworn that my hair was darker and thicker than before, my skin was darker and prettier as well. However, it was the mark on my hand that startled me the most. Thin silver swirls covered my hand in intricate patterns. Well, hell. How exactly do I explain this?

And suddenly, I felt healthy and whole for the first time in a year. I caught a glimpse of amber eyes just before I collapsed. Strong arms wrapped around me and for the second time, Sam Uley had me wrapped in his arms. For the second time, I drifted to sleep against his chest. And for the moment, I forgot that I hated him with a passion. For the moment, he was just the boy who had managed to catch me as I fell and who held me softly for the second time in a year. I caught myself sighing in content.

One last thought crossed my mind. What the hell is wrong with me? A split second later, I realized I really didn't care. I was in the arms of Sam Uley and for a tiny portion of a second, all was right with the world. And then I knew no more.

**Thanks For Reading. Sorry for the delay. Serious writer's block. I know. Bad excuse. It's true though.**

**~Fictionlover**


	8. Donkeys and Bullshit

FUCK! My head hurts like a motherfucking donkey used it as kicking practice in the middle of traffic. That and I think I've gone blind. Wait. Nope. False alarm. My eyes just refuse to open. My ears, however, can pick up the low tones of male voices whispering at each other. I try to listen closer, but my head rebels. Shit, that hurts. What the hell did I do? Fall off a thirteen-story building after drinking a bottle of whiskey? Ugh. I hate pain. I'm getting out of touch with it. Thank God Leah cured my clumsiness. I could not deal with this everyday. I snuggled down into my bed…hold on. Couch? Where the hell am I?

I finally got my eyes to open, albeit slowly. I almost groaned. Why in God's name was I at the Black's house? What did I do to deserve this? Karma is such a bitch. I mean damn. This is just cruel. Sure, I love Billy. He's like my uncle or something. However, I'm so not in the mood to see and/or listen to Jake. That's why Billy comes to my house for dinner. I make it a point to not even pass by this place. I don't have to see his traitor son that way.

Oh. My head hurts. I wish Carlisle was here, just to cure my headache. Yes. That's how bad it hurts. I'm wishing for a Cullen. At least the vampires keep on top of things. Sam could have caught me a little bit sooner. HOLY FUCK! SAM! How could I forget he found me in the woods? I'm screwed. Damn. I was planning on going to college too. Why was he in the damn woods anyway? How did he find me? If he didn't have a heartbeat, I would swear he was a vampire. He was silent, fast, and gives of waves of power.

Wait. Holy shit on a stick. I'm one hell of an idiot. Vampires. Sparkly Fuckers. Drinkers of Red Bodily Fluid. Whatever the hell else you call them. They exist. They're in the stories of the tribe. I'm part fucking Quileute. How did I not get this before? Whatever Sam is would be in the tribe legends. A whole bunch of ridiculously different boys from the reservation wouldn't just gang up together because they felt like it. Especially someone Sam's age with someone Jake's age. Nonsense. Doesn't happen, especially in such a big group. Why is everything in the legends true? Let's put the puzzle together, shall we?

The sparkly fuckers come to Forks. Sam disappears, comes back after a month, breaks up with Leah, and starts a gang of teenage boys. Wolf tracks in the woods. The giant bear sightings by hikers. The growth spurts and disappearances. The sudden anger and rejection. The way they revolve around each other. The way they move. Holy hell. Why can't people be normal? I pissed off a giant powerful guy. Not only that, I pissed off a giant powerful guy that turns into a wolf. Fuck. Why is it always me?

And then, I was caught. Billy caught my eyes open and called me out on it. "Hey sleeping beauty, I thought you'd never wake up." Wow. Corny.

"Well, if I knew I'd be seeing your ugly mug, I would've stayed sleeping." Billy just laughed. I love him. He can take a joke almost as easily as Jake could. I laughed a little too, until I saw the owner of the other voice. Of course it was Sam. My mouth snapped shut and I stared straight into his eyes. I felt calm, but at the same time I wanted to be pissed off. The Black's house? Really? He just looked at me with an odd look in his eyes.

"Not to be rude, but why am I here?" I was really hoping for a quick escape. Maybe I could pull off some ninja roles.

"Well, I think we all have some explaining to do." Billy just looked at me expectantly. Shit. Looks like I'm stuck with the old man and the fleabag.

"You mean you're going to explain why there is a pack of werewolves hanging around La Push? Or my sudden change in appearance and weird tattoo?" I almost laughed at the look on Billy's face. Even Uley looked a little taken aback. Fish faces all around. I was dying to snap a picture for Leah. "Personally, I want to know about the wolves first." Billy regained his composure and started to speak.

"You know our legends, correct?" He waited for my small nod before continuing. "Shape-shifters are born into families of the older bloodlines. They have the gene to phase when vampires are near. There are many signs of phasing, if you know what to look for. Sudden growth spurts and increased tempers are the first. Aches and pains are the second. Last are the reflexes and the temperature. Their bodies start the transformation and then there is no reversing it. They change into wolves when the anger takes hold of them. They exist to protect our land and our people from vampires." I nodded at him once more. Sam startled me when he stepped out from behind me and gave Billy a look. He silently padded toward the porch and sat down on the bench. Billy then continued.

"The pack shares a mind and shares memories. Secrets make a pack weak. The wolf is their greatest ally and our worst enemy. The wolf holds the key to everything about their lives and futures. And the wolf is always clawing at the human." Okay. Wow. Kinda morbid. I can see why Sam is an asshole. Kind of.

"Sam is the alpha." It was not a question. Billy nodded and I turned my gaze to Sam. His eyes briefly flashed yellow as they met mine. He silently nodded his head and turned to look out into the woods once more. I turned to face Billy. He looked at me in curiosity.

"Have you looked in a mirror lately, child?"

"No." I knew I looked a little different, but it couldn't be that much. Of course, I was wrong. Billy brought me a mirror. I almost dropped it. But damn, I looked good. My cheekbones were higher, my honey eyes were tinged with hints of blue and were more almond-shaped, and my skin a pretty honey color. The ebony curls that were swinging around my face framed all of this. I had changed a tad more than a little. "Oh hell."

"We knew you had Quileute in you. Your father's grandfather was a pureblood and your grandmother was seven eighths Quileute. Charlie got the rare pale skin, though he is mostly Quileute. He just chooses not to live on the reservation. Renee was at least half Quileute on her mother's side. That is all we know."

"Then why did I suddenly change?" Please, share with the class.

"Because, like the wolves, you are special. The tattoo on your hand looked familiar at first, but now I am sure I recognize it." Uh huh. Wow. Okay. Helpful.

"What is it?"

"I believe you are the pack's Secret Keeper, their spirit guardian." That was a lot of help. I think he practices the cryptic bullshit in the mirror. Fucking ace. I _still_ have no idea what is going on.

"Which means…?" Come on. Spit it out.

"Be patient, Bells. I have to inform the other tribal elders. You will be summoned to a council meeting to be informed of your duties and roles within the pack and tribe. Until then, take it easy." He flashed me a smirk and rolled away. Sly old man. He'll live to regret it.

I walked out of the house with a sigh. I hate waiting. I was getting ready to walk myself home when Sam grabbed my hand. I looked up at him quickly and spoke before I could get lost in his eyes. "Yes?" He didn't answer. Without warning he put me on his back and melted into a wolf. And then he ran. I may have screamed. Just a little.

Men. I hate them.

**2 chapters in 2 days. Not so bad, if I do say so myself. I'm trying to make it up to you guys. Tell me what you think.**

**~Fictionlover  
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	9. Wolf Back Riding and Happy Pills

Wolf-back riding should be classified as an extreme sport. Not many get to do it in a lifetime, hell, or even three. I am not one of the rare loony people who have gone wolf-back riding. Nope. Never once in my life. I'm not that fucking crazy you dipshits. I'm disappointed in you people. I'm not fucking stupid.

However, Shape-shifter riding…or Sam riding, though that sounds so much fucking worse and way the hell out of context…should be banned for the safety and sanity of people everywhere. Or, maybe I'm on a shitload of drugs. Or high. You can never rule out being high. It can happen to anyone. Probably. Charlie would agree. He'd say it is a rite of passage. Off the record of course. Billy, the sly old geezer, would second that motion. Silly reckless old men. No wonder I'm fucked up.

Sam is no better. This is the second time I've been thrown on his back in a week. A fucking week. And I wasn't allowed to see Leah. Again. Luckily the bitch had to visit her cousin, so she didn't really know I couldn't talk to her anyway. I guess it works out.

And now I'm on Sam's back heading to a meeting to find out what the hell the motherfucking fates have come up for me now. Ugh. I hate the fucking supernatural. Why can't the little assholes learn to leave me out of their business? But no. That's asking too much, apparently. And Billy deliberately drew this out so that I would be bouncing when I arrived. Bastard.

The meeting hall was probably the biggest building on the reservation. I almost laughed at the scene when I walked in. It was a classic Star Trek Vulcan Council moment. Everyone had their serious faces on. Plus, they were sitting up behind a platform so that I had to look up at all of them. I may have giggled, you know, just a little. Especially since Uncle Billy was trying to hide his smirk while attempting to look intimidating and/or commanding. This was the tribal elder and chief who used to smoke pot with my dad, the cop. Nope. Not fooling me, but I'll pretend, you know, to save his image. Though of course, Harry isn't so innocent either….

A throat clearing pulled me out of my disorganized thoughts and Billy opened his mouth to speak. "Isabella Maria Swan, you have been presented before the elders today so that the Quileute tribal council can confirm the presence of a Secret Keeper in our tribe once more." The power he commanded surprised me. His voice drew attention and demanded reverence. He had never sounded like this around me. He suddenly seemed to be sitting up straighter. He looked _powerful._ He looked like an Indian Chief.

My own voice bubbled back in response, but it was not me who spoke. I had no control over my body. "My eyes and ears belong to the elders, to the guardians, and to the tribe. I live to protect and to watch in mind, body, and spirit." I lowered my head and bent on one knee. Even Billy looked impressed for a moment, until he covered it up.

"She has answered. We have heard. We have seen. Do we offer a test?" The others answer as one.

"Let us see if the child is worthy to be called a shadow walker. Let her convince us she is chosen by the spirits." This came from a woman I did not know. Her hair fell in long silver and ebony braids, framing wise coffee eyes, eyes older than time. She stared through me and I thought I saw the hint of a smile.

Chief William Black spoke once more. He looked right at me with those usually laughing eyes and they gleamed in anticipation.

"Great spirits, show your claim on this child of the wolf. Let her resonate with your power." His voice rose in a crescendo and I could feel the command, the raw weight of the words. My body responded to the power in his still-echoing voice. My head snapped up and I stood tall and straight. I felt something bubble within me, waiting to come out. My eyes burned and I felt them change. My head flew back and a beautiful eerie howl fell from my lips and out into the wind. I watched in horrified awe as a large creature stepped from my body.

The ethereal wolf possessed a lean body covered in a mixture of auburn and tawny fur, only accented by fiery intelligent honey eyes. The creature stalked toward Billy, never touching the ground with its paws, always stepping centimeters above it. Each step it advanced, it seemed to shift and flicker, easing in and out like a flame. It stopped directly in front of Billy and bowed, once again let out a piercing unearthly cry. Almost immediately it was answered by a quickly building crescendo of keening. It was horrifying and beautiful all at once. I could feel them drawing closer. Through the noise, I heard Billy speak and saw his eyes flash in the muted light.

"Do we accept her claim?" His shout resonated throughout the hall.

"We accept." This soft-spoken statement was punctuated by the frenzied singing of the wolves, ever drawing closer. The wolf floated back to me, merging into my body. I felt complete in a way I never realized I was missing. I heard a gasp from one of the elders, but I thought nothing of it because at that moment, I opened my eyes and I could _see._ There was so much more beauty in the world than I had imagined. I could feel the wind around me, shifting a tugging. There were muted voices, speaking all around me. But mostly, I felt something stirring and shifting inside me, nestling inside my body and merging with every strand of my being. Far away I could hear the beating of drums and joyous laughing, and then, it faded away until I could only hear the whisper of happy signs. I stared straight ahead, listening. Always listening.

And then they came. Almost too quickly, I was surrounded by a ring of wolves, circling and watching. And we waited for something none of us could comprehend. I could smell the faint scent of apples in the air, and suddenly, I knew everything would be fine. And now, all I wanted to know was what was going to happen next.

All of the noise stopped. There was tension in the air as we all waited for the chief to speak. "We welcome Quileute Secret Keeper Kamali, our Shadow Walker and..." And suddenly, I understood. I knew the name he had given me, and on some level, I understood it.

"Spirit guide." I finished his sentence. All eyes were on me. Even Billy was mildly surprised.

"Yes, child. You are their guide," The old woman spoke once again. Billy regained his composure and cleared his throat.

"You are the Quileute Tribe's last defense. If you should fail, then none have a chance at survival." Well, shit. No pressure.

"What does being a Secret Keeper or a Shadow Walker signify, for me and for the tribe?"

"For the tribe, it means the spirits are sending out their strongest weapons. There is a storm brewing over the horizon and the spirits are strengthening our last defenses. For you, it means you are akin to our spirit warriors of old, and a sister to our wolves. You are both, neither, and more. It is your duty to protect the wolves as they protect us." He is a maddening, cryptic, useless, withholding, old man.

"Child, there will be more Keepers coming. They will join you and make the wolves stronger." The old woman smiled softly at my widened eyes.

"She is right. There are others coming. They will come to protect, to keep, to help, to rescue, and to renew." The meeting went on for a while longer. I lost focus. I couldn't think any longer. I stepped sluggishly and hesitantly towards the door. I dragged myself through the frame and came face to face with the tall wolf leaning against the wall. He smirked devilishly as my eyes met his.

"Welcome to the Quileute Council." Fuck. And then I was thrown onto the black wolf's back. Spirits help me. Hell, I'm going to need a nap and a shitload of happy pills. And maybe I'll yell at Sam. Then I might almost feel normal. Almost. Fuck.

**Sorry for the wait. Lots of tests to study for and other various things. Yadda yadda. Yeah, I know. No excuses. Sorry. It took a while to get the creative juices flowing.**

**As always, thanks for reading and a special thanks to all my reviewers lately.  
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**~Fictionlover  
><strong>


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